Families play a key role in military culture and the need for that support does not end once their loved ones are no longer serving on active duty. Involvement and understanding are vital as their veteran transitions into civilian life. The following are statements from caregivers and families who have seen, first-hand, the impact of the FOCUS Program and how lessons learned are carried home.
Holly W.
Wife of FOCUS Marine (FOCUS March 2025)
Dear FOCUS Marines,
My name is Holly Wright, my husband Charles Wright had the pleasure of attending your program and becoming a graduate on March 8th, 2025.
Charles had incessantly struggled with his PTSD for a substantial part of his life. Alongside him, his children had only known Charles with PTSD and I met him a whole decade after his service. He had never been to the VA or asked for compensation which led to developed tendencies that he thought would protect him. When in fact, he was creating an environment where his family felt the desire to support and comfort him, except we also felt like we were constantly walking on eggshells to keep harmony in the house. I recall feeling as though my purpose in life was to assist Charles in getting from one stressful occasion to the next, always striving to keep him stable. I did not put any priority in my emotions or well-being. I needed him to be seen.
Amid Charles’ week at FOCUS I participated in a book club with Semper Fi Fund. The book the group happen to be reading this week was “ON FIRE” authored by John O’Leary. When I completed this amazing book, I was absolutely unquestioning, the timing of this retreat was intended to be. John supported me in preparing for his arrival home. I was in desperate need of a new perspective to support this unique experience I was having. There was a nervousness and some fear he would outgrow us during his transformation, this book aided in letting that feeling go. However, I learned later I wasn’t the only one who had the opportunity to be healed by John’s words. In some magical act of events Charles didn’t just meet amazing people to encourage and support him during his healing journey, he met John O’Leary himself! Charles returned with a signed copy of “ON FIRE” and a heartfelt note. I felt so seen by my husband for thinking of me when it was time to get his book signed. Apart from John’s book, the worksheets shared by Stacy Penningroth offered a glimpse into what Charles was learning. This granted me the opportunity to spend the week applying and implementing the information so kindly shared by Stacy. Learning about Fact vs. Meaning, the 3R’s, and victim mindset vs responsible mindset, were invaluable. The worksheets helped me realize I have a responsibility to myself and my family to be the best version of myself. I also received a phone call from Kim Bradley in response to an email I sent in regard to my fear of Charles out growing us throughout his time at FOCUS. It was a heartfelt call from a fellow marine wife. I was grateful for the guidance she volunteered.
His time away felt like we were on our own personal journey’s, we healed our wounds allowing us to become wiser and more present. Charles return home was emotional. He was confident he experienced numerous synchronicities amidst his week away including the truth that FOCUS Marines was exactly where he was essentially meant to be and our love was designed to survive and thrive. His excitement over sharing his notebook and binder with the family was evident. It invited us to experience his healing and facilitate the convalescence of every family member. The GAP was the initial tool he was swift in implementing. Having three boys under age 11 can be easily overstimulating and can leave you feeling overpowered. Charles now vocalizes about his intention to be in the GAP, a tool he has taught each of us at home. This is a tool utilized frequently to generate more balance in our household.
Charles is undoubtedly evolving into the individual he was intended to be and this is apparent in his day-to-day. I believe FOCUS Marines’s needs to be recognized here for the knowledge and support offered during his retreat. I see him walk with a new purpose allowing his light to shine brightly, something he did not do before FOCUS. He appears to think more clearly and communicates more efficiently. Charles challenging days have become less frequent because we are better equipped to handle them. I see him offer encouragement and compassion. He is less quick to give responses clouded in anger and frustration. He comes across as thoughtful and more caring by asking more questions to gain clarity before responding. I am so grateful to FOCUS Marines for supporting discovery of the incredible light that is Charles.
I’d like to also share advice to a spouse who’s spouse is going or have gone through FOCUS.
Please, do not think there will not be any more challenging days, these days are meant be to learned from. Encourage your spouse to apply what FOCUS has taught them. What I learned through my graduate and through my communication with FOCUS individuals was, first, to remember you are not alone, FOCUS is a family. Second, if you ever have questions, they really mean it in their email when they say, “please feel free to reach out if you have any questions”!
Thank you from the bottom of my heart,
Holly Wright
Miatta
Wife of FOCUS Marine (FOCUS June 2013)
Murrieta, CA
“After getting out of the Marine Corps, my husband struggled with finding purpose. Over the course of five years our family went through many trials. Our marriage was almost destroyed. Finally the light went on when my husband was diagnosed with PTSD.
Through the USMC wounded warrior regiment, my husband found FOCUS in 2013. At first we did not know what to expect. We had learned not to rely on anything from the government and had a sense of disillusionment about the military. His core values and beliefs in the Marine Corps, to look out and take care of each other, was non-existent. So as I dropped him off, I had little expectations about FOCUS.
Well I am Happy to say that FOCUS changed everything.
My husband before FOCUS was searching and disillusioned. After FOCUS he came back with more purpose than I had ever seen in our 8 years of marriage. He became a Marine again. He had a renewed vision to not be disabled but to enable his other Marines to get help. His renewed purpose has changed our family. Our girls have all seen the change in Daddy, and have become so supportive in his goal to help other Marines. God, through FOCUS, has given my family purpose. My girls have their Father back, and I have my Marine back. My family will forever be grateful to the FOCUS Marines Foundation for the mission that is now before us. Thank you for making us all proud to be a part of the Marine Corps family.”
Norton & Linda
Parents of FOCUS Marine (FOCUS Sept 2013)
Melbourne, FL
“We wanted to offer our sincere appreciation for allowing our son to attend the program your foundation provides.
Michael’s struggle with PTSD and TBI has been a very long and heartbreaking experience for him as well as his entire family.
The changes in Mike are amazing. He needed to feel a part of something important again, and to rebuild his confidence and broken spirit. We believe that Focus Marines Foundation has given Mike a new direction by providing informative classes, many networking opportunities and skills as well as a true sense of camaraderie and accomplishment.
Instead of turning silent and inward, he now desires to reach out and encourage other PTSD sufferers. You have our heartfelt gratitude now and always.”
Kimberly
Wife of FOCUS Marine (USA 82nd Airborne) (FOCUS Sept 2013)
St. Peters, MO
“Before he went to the (FOCUS) program he was angry, impatient, and spent no time with our kids at all. He would disassociate himself from our kids, me, and anyone we knew, even his own parents. He won’t admit it but I think he may have been a little depressed. He had no desire to go anywhere.”
“While he was at the program he began talking to me at night and telling me that he was sorry for everything he had done. He told me everything was going to change from here on out. Now mind you he had said all of these same things to me before. So of course I thought “…we will see.” Now I have no idea what they do at the FOCUS program. All I know is things really did change.”
“As weeks went by I noticed more changes. He had patience for our kids. He wouldn’t get frustrated and yell at them. They use to be so scared of him. Now, they will sit on the couch next to him all cuddled up and watch “Hockey” and “Feetball” as our boys say. They love spending time with daddy now.”
“…there was also our relationship that needed help. Like I said the FOCUS program worked wonders. I actually started to feel appreciated again from him. I felt reconnected with him. After FOCUS he made more of an effort to be connected to me. He would hold my hand or just cuddle with me a little bit.”
“Mike even started to care about himself again. He would make sure he would work out or do something to get himself out of the house. He told me a while back that while he was at FOCUS, he really got to reflect on his life and see that he didn’t care about himself anymore. He wanted to change that. He makes sure even now to do something every day to get out of the house. He still keeps in contact with some of the marines from the program and if he is having a bad day he has someone to talk to. Someone who has been there. Someone who understands. Let’s face it. Wives don’t understand. We can say we do and try to all we want, but we never will understand. We have not physically been in that situation ourselves. Having these marines from FOCUS is like a therapy of a different kind for him – Someone he trust and he can confide in. He needs that. They all need someone to talk to.”
“I just want to say THANK YOU for the FOCUS Program. Who knows where we would be today without it. FOCUS has been better for him than any other program he has tried so far. For the Program to only be a week long and make that much progress is amazing. I thank you so much for the Focus Program every day. It was a blessing for him to have learned about it and have the opportunity to go.”
